The countdown is running
It will not be long...
Oh how happy I am to finally be able to meet you, my greatest treasure!
For 32 weeks now, a small heart has been beating in my stomach and from minute to minute, from day to day, the love for this incomprehensible miracle is growing immeasurably.
The last few months have often not been that easy. Pregnancy can be exhausting, nerve-wracking and exhausting. So incredibly much is changing. Suddenly in the middle of the night you have an almost insatiable craving for honey pickles and the next moment it feels like you can never eat again. The hormones take you and your mood on a roller coaster and suddenly parts of your body hurt that you have never felt before. You become spongy in the brain and the body is a bloated sponge.
And despite all this - it's a miracle. So incomprehensible, so beautiful, so full of love.
For me, this pregnancy and the thought of becoming a mother soon is the greatest happiness. And it's also a tremendous challenge to keep my body hydrated with the many tears I shed almost daily - tears of bliss.
For a long time I suppressed my desire to have children, almost extinguished it. For many reasons. But sometimes because I was too scared. Having a high spinal cord injury is often enough of a challenge. Add to that a pregnancy - phew, there were always a lot of question marks, concerns and fears in my head. In addition, relatively few testimonials from other women and a general skepticism in society.
I am now in the 33rd week of pregnancy and apart from a few usual aches and pains, dizzy spells and cravings for honey pickles, my baby bump time has so far been quite unproblematic and completely normal.
My body does this wonderfully! Kudos to you at this point!
From the beginning I tried to be as relaxed as possible with everything. Of course, that was sometimes easier for me, sometimes harder. Now there are only a few weeks until the birth. It's going to be a cesarean. And I'm really looking forward to the little man!
I get a lot of questions about my pregnancy and how I imagine being a mom. I wanted to use my blog to answer and clarify all these questions and maybe also to encourage other women.
Now the last few months have flown by and I actually managed to publish only one blog post.
But it is the way it is and now I'm using today to report a little more extensively here.
But one thing is very important to me at this point: Yes, I would like to share many experiences. But a lot also remains private. I want to protect my little family and there are issues that seem too personal to write, speak or share about publicly.
Here are a few more questions and topics summarized:
Everyday life with paraplegia and pregnancy:
As already mentioned, my pregnancy has been completely normal and uncomplicated so far. The only things I often struggle with are my circulation and very low blood pressure. And my bladder is very prone to urinary tract infections, which is why I'm now on a long-term antibiotic.
Of course, everyday life with the ever-rounder and bigger stomach becomes increasingly strenuous. I need more support with a lot of things, my food regularly ends up on my sweater instead of in my mouth (the distance to the dining table is increasing) and I've become incredibly clumsy. But so far everything is manageable and I have the best support ever!
I'm still working hard, even though I've actually wanted to be on maternity leave for weeks. But I just enjoy my work too much.
I am often asked if I can feel the movements of the baby:
YES! And how! A very active child lives in my stomach and I feel the kicks, turns and boxing lessons and I am always fascinated by what is happening inside.
There is one subject I would like to address more extensively when I have the opportunity, and that is the prejudices that exist. Disabled mom.
Questions arise as to how I would like to take care of my child if I am dependent on support myself. Doesn't it make me sad that I won't be able to do a lot with my child? Am I not afraid of this and that? That I expect a lot from it. That the child will certainly not have an easy time at school...
The prejudices and sometimes discrimination that reach me directly are rare. But I know they are there - lots of them.
My child, our child, will be loved, with all my heart and that is probably the most important thing. There is so much love and confidence in me and we will do everything with it.
Last but not least, the issue of wheelchair-accessible aids:
There are many furniture and baby accessories designed for parents in wheelchairs. You could spend an incredible amount of money on it.
I decided to let the whole thing come to me. I can't yet assess what we really need, what I can do on my own and where I will need support. Only the changing table is height-adjustable and wheelchair-accessible, so it can be used by me and by standing winders.
We will see everything else and I am looking forward to this exciting journey. Besides, I'm not alone. A loving environment awaits, which is incredibly looking forward to these little people and living this journey together with me and us.
Now I will devote myself to a glass of honey pickles again and send a lot of love, confidence and cohesion in this somewhat turbulent time that we are all experiencing here right now.